Post by Uzumaki Ijoufu on Aug 11, 2006 4:31:05 GMT -5
With a Big Apology to Slash Happy, I'm posting this as a reservation of my attempt to compete for the Uzumaki spot.
General Info
Name: Uzumaki Ijoufu
Nickname: Coach
Age: 12
Gender: Male
Rank: Genin (finally)
Specialty: Strategy and every sports fact known to man.
Home Village: Konoha
Graduation Dates/Ages: Entrance 8, Graduation 12
Personality: Ijoufu is the most underappreciated ninja in Konoha….. and he knows it. When looking at his test scores it is a mystery as to why he was held back... well not completely.
Ijoufu ia the most prank-tastic ninja ever. His funny bone must have been implanted by the Kaguya clan since it is unfathomable how strong it is. Most of the tricks are usually harmless... but when the occasional prank goes awry he is seen as a monster, a hoodlum, a thugged out gangsta straight outta Compton…maybe not that but they look down on him. Although he isn’t sure as to why this is he has a good feeling it is because of the thing trapped in his bowels.
His trickster nature has also always fueled his desire to be admired, admonished, ad-sexed-up-like-a-fiend, and all the other words that start with ad that do good things. He is very outgoing and tries to win friends with his jovial side… in retrospect his jovial side seems more like his angry side… well he is also incredibly playful in nature, his motto is a life without laughter is a life un-lived.
Ijoufu is also the largest sports fan in the world. His knowledge of skills and tactics in sports is unrivaled. Despite Ijoufu’s “curse” he is heralded by those who know him as the greatest sports mind to ever emerge from Japan since Vince-o Lombardi-o (Vince's Identical Japanese Twin.) Ijoufu will and does refer to almost anything in the context of sports. Even his training looks like he is running drills.
He earned his nickname, Coach, by giving great advice when pertaining to training and fundamental skills.
Theme Songs: Always Look on the Bright Side of Life by Monty Python (The Life of Brian)
Likes: Pranks, jokes, tricks… my thesaurus is broken
Dislikes: Hecklers, chauvinists, those who require more spotlight then him, Siegfried and Roy (Those Fuckin’ Tigers with their crappy magic! I’m glad they ate Roy’s Face)
Clan/Organization: Uzumaki Clan- the clan whose motto is 1 is the loneliest number.
Partner/s: His endless supply of sports memorabilia
Character Appearance
Eyes: Black
Hair: Blonde
Attire: Ijoufu is always seen wearing at least 1 piece of sports equipment or a jersey. Also he always carries his “equipment bag” and his “playbook” (Explained Later)
Height: 5’7”
Weight: 164
Bloodtype: O+
Family and History
Family: This is under speculation of every fan of the Naruto series therefore I won’t spoil it (As if I knew the answer...)
Family History: I am strictly forbidden under the penalty of perjury and therefore I will plead the 5th for this.
Character History:
Welcome to the life and times of Uzumaki Ijoufu. Like all great minds, athletes, or people, Ijoufu was faced with a life changing hardship early in his childhood, at birth infact. On the day the ancient beast of legend, the Kyuubi, or Nine-Tailed Demon Fox was sealed by the heroic actions of Yondaime Hokage. The honor granted by this “blessing” was unfortunately lost upon the people of Konoha however, They mistook the “blessing” and understood it as a “curse,” It is a shame that such a great man would be so tormented by the misunderstandings of the common people. If only the Yondaime Hokage had not needed to sacrifice his own body to contain the demon the message would not have been falsely interpreted.
Alas, due to the misconception from his birth to age 3 he was excruciatingly malnourished by his foster family. During a visit Sandaime Hokage discovered the boy’s incredibly emaciated state. As a favor to the boy and to his successor, Sandaime sent the boy away to a normal village to live free of the ninja life until he was more prepared. The village was not very far from Konoha but due to the danger of Kyuubi being present several undercover ANBU were always on watch.
At age 3 he became aware enough of his surroundings to start making friends. He was quite popular, though at age 3 this is not very difficult. Over the next 3 years his popularity continued. He was an athlete and great athletes with great personalities are always popular.
From the moment he learned of their existence Ijoufu was in love with sports, sports strategy, sports facts, everything sports related. Whatever method he could use he would enjoy every sport he could find. He would scour libraries of film and libraries of books just so he could learn more. He knew everything that could be known.
By the age of 7 Ijoufu was the most popular lonely child ever. Even though he had many friends they had many problems playing with him. He was not only knowledgeable in sports but skilled in them too. His friends just couldn’t keep up at all. He would always end up being the best referee known to man.
A few months after Ijoufu’s 7th birthday he was blessed with a more than special guest, The legendary 3rd Hokage had graced the village with his presence. Everyone was excited unaware to the reason. When he requested to see Ijoufu it was a shock to some. Was Konoha going to start an inter-country sports league? Nearly everyone was caught off guard when Ijoufu was summoned to return to his home in Konoha to reclaim his place training as a ninja. People were more shocked when Ijoufu immediately responded with a blatant, “NO!”
The Hokage took Ijoufu aside. ”Ijoufu, you must understand your place is with Konoha. You must have noticed the apparent physical differences. You are a ninja and always will be.”
Ijoufu shook his head in obvious agreement, “I knew I was a ninja, but Ninja are not humans. Humans care, they feel. Hokage-sama, have you ever eaten wood splinters because nothing else was available? Have you ever been forced to deal the grains of the wood destroy your throat?!”
The Hokage was astonished, “So you seem to remember. This does make things more difficult. The most I can guarantee is you will not have to rely on others. The people of Konoha will supply you with housing and food bills. I will do what I can to ensure you will not ever have to face that again.”
Ijoufu sat silent for several minutes just staring at the most powerful man in the country. He was using everything he had learned about finding clues by looking at facial expressions and features. He could find no trace of deception. Hesitantly he agreed. He knew no athlete could succeed and become a better one without rising to the competition. The competition was certainly too low here.
Ijoufu was settled into his apartment in Konoha within the week. It was painful leaving his friends but he simply explained it as being called up to the big leagues. Ijoufu was truly a loner in Konoha. He noticed everyone wanted to play Ninja, never baseball or any other sport. If he was allowed to play he didn’t understand the rules (nor did he want to) nearly well enough to play effectively. He was lonely for most of his 7th year of life.
When he was 8 Ijoufu was allowed to enter the academy. He trained with all his might and even found himself to be considered skilled in comparison to some of the others. The one downfall was his social skills. Everyone he was with knew nothing of how to throw a proper curveball or to perfect a spiral on a football, they were more concerned how to mold chakra or how their dad’s stuck to the walls with just their feet. They just wanted bigger signing bonuses.
Ijoufu was called by his teachers, Coach, originally because of his sports knowledge but after a while because they knew Coaches to be a different breed of person. Ijoufu would only seem content when he could help someone else. His skills always seemed to be just enough to be not noticed except when he was helping someone else. His sensei always noticed his forms and skills never seem truly polished until someone needed an example for help. He really relished any opportunity to help.
Ijoufu went through school for 3 years quite unfulfilled. He was known as the kid who could help you if you needed anything, but you shouldn’t hang out with him. Apparently despite his leaving, the parents never forgot his existence…..why? Why was he so hated that one family would starve him and all others would ostracize him?
When a coach is put up against the odds there is 1 thing to do... Watch film. In this case film was forfeit to the library record books. He checked over everything he could. Mainly he checked in pertaining to his birth year. One fact remained outstanding, the disappearance of the beast that killed so many. All that is mentioned was the 4th agve his life to seal the beast…… WHERE? HOW? This had something to do with him.
A few weeks went by in class; the normal spark that fueled Ijoufu had disappeared. His lackluster performance continued straight into the exam week and he was summarily failed, despite all his previous perfection.
The moment the academy tests were given out Ijoufu immediately ran to his new hangout, the library. He continued scanning every bit of Konoha History for a way to find out the slightest clue as to his existence. Soon after the unthinkable happened, someone had answers.
Exactly 1 week after graduation Ijoufu checked one of the newer books about Konoha History, inside it was a note addressed to him.
Dear Ijoufu,
I know what you have been searching for. I know your past, I know your future. I know why you were starved and why you are hated. I know why you come here everyday looking for a new clue. I can help, but I’d need your help too. If you are interested meet me in section Z-25, I will contact you there.
Signed,
The Key to Your Past
Ijoufu’s curiosity could not be contained. He had to find out what this was about. His past, his existence... the questions he so desired could finally be answered. He slowly moved to the section trying to say as inconspicuous as possible.
He arrived in section Z-25 only to find a large scroll left leaning on a bookcase. Ijoufu could feel it in his bones that in that scroll were answers in some way or another. He took the scroll and make haste out of the village
There he was sitting in the forest sprawled out trying to figure out everything in the scroll. Everything was in order he had to start from the basics, that was how sports training worked, with the fundamentals.
He worked and worked, the jutsu was something very complex. He was exhausting his chakra abilities just trying to learn it. When he first succeeded on the jutsu it had to have been more than 12 hours. Light had already left and returned. The jutsu was perfect for Ijoufu though. If anything he had a real team now. The jutsu, Kage Bunshin was perfect for the type of person he wanted to be, the perfect athlete.
The scroll must have been filled with other great things. The moment he began to move to the second page he felt eyes watching him. Someone was near. Out of the shadows came the librarian...wait what? Yes it was the only person who knew what books Ijoufu was looking at. He brought out a sword, the calm and educated humanity that dictated his life was overshadowed by his intense bloodlust. He was here to kill Ijoufu!
He went to pounce Ijoufu, “DIE FOX!”
It hit him harder than the librarian ever could. He was NOT THE FOX! The fox didn’t like sports the fox didn’t have friends who he was forced to leave! Ijoufu, barely escaped a fatal wound when he brought his hand up to deflect the attack. If any time was proper now was the best one to use his new technique.
Long story short Team Ijoufu beat the Librarian worse than the 49ers beat the Broncos in Superbowl XXIV. Good thing he liked books, he would have several months to kill in the hospital after Ijoufu did the Superbowl Shuffle on his face.
When the other ninja arrived they found Ijoufu stomping on his unconscious assailant. He was shouting the same thing over and over again, “I AM MYSELF!” When he was brought out before the Sandaime Hokage it was discovered the Hokage had witnessed most of the incident. In respect for Ijoufu’s previous grades and obvious understanding of Ninja techniques he was graduated to Genin.
Combat Info
Weapons:(note these are the pieces of equipment Ijoufu has,he does not keep them with him at all times.)
5x Kunai
5x Shuriken
“Baseball Bombs” (Baseballs with Exploding tags on them)
“Big Boom Football” (a football with exploding tags. More area more tags.)
Football pads and helmet
Baseball Bat
“Puck You’s” (Hockey Puck with flash tags on them.)
Hockey Stick
Virtually every piece of sports equipment though these are the most notable.
Jutsu:
Name: Bunshin no Jutsu - Clone Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: The user creates ethereal copies of themselves from chakra that are unable to speak or make contact with an object. They disappear after a single hit.
Rank: E
Cost: 1
Name: Henge – Transform
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: A basic jutsu where the user alters their appearance. Those with a doujutsu (i.e. Sharingan and Byakugan) can see through it very easily.
Rank: E
Cost: 1
Name: Kawarimi - Body Substitution Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: A very basic escape jutsu where the user switches places with a nearby object.
Rank: E
Cost: 1
Name: Kage Bunshin no Jutsu – Shadow Replication Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: As Bunshin no Jutsu but the clones are corporeal until they are dealt critical damage.
Rank: A
Cost: ?
Name: Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu – Mass Shadow Replication Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: As Kage Bunshin no Jutsu but with far greater numbers.
Rank: S
Cost: ?
Special: Ijoufu is the container for the mythical 9-tailed beast Kyuubi. This grants special powers to Ijoufu during times of great emotional rage (though he doesn’t know this yet.)
**Other:
General Info
Name: Uzumaki Ijoufu
Nickname: Coach
Age: 12
Gender: Male
Rank: Genin (finally)
Specialty: Strategy and every sports fact known to man.
Home Village: Konoha
Graduation Dates/Ages: Entrance 8, Graduation 12
Personality: Ijoufu is the most underappreciated ninja in Konoha….. and he knows it. When looking at his test scores it is a mystery as to why he was held back... well not completely.
Ijoufu ia the most prank-tastic ninja ever. His funny bone must have been implanted by the Kaguya clan since it is unfathomable how strong it is. Most of the tricks are usually harmless... but when the occasional prank goes awry he is seen as a monster, a hoodlum, a thugged out gangsta straight outta Compton…maybe not that but they look down on him. Although he isn’t sure as to why this is he has a good feeling it is because of the thing trapped in his bowels.
His trickster nature has also always fueled his desire to be admired, admonished, ad-sexed-up-like-a-fiend, and all the other words that start with ad that do good things. He is very outgoing and tries to win friends with his jovial side… in retrospect his jovial side seems more like his angry side… well he is also incredibly playful in nature, his motto is a life without laughter is a life un-lived.
Ijoufu is also the largest sports fan in the world. His knowledge of skills and tactics in sports is unrivaled. Despite Ijoufu’s “curse” he is heralded by those who know him as the greatest sports mind to ever emerge from Japan since Vince-o Lombardi-o (Vince's Identical Japanese Twin.) Ijoufu will and does refer to almost anything in the context of sports. Even his training looks like he is running drills.
He earned his nickname, Coach, by giving great advice when pertaining to training and fundamental skills.
Theme Songs: Always Look on the Bright Side of Life by Monty Python (The Life of Brian)
Likes: Pranks, jokes, tricks… my thesaurus is broken
Dislikes: Hecklers, chauvinists, those who require more spotlight then him, Siegfried and Roy (Those Fuckin’ Tigers with their crappy magic! I’m glad they ate Roy’s Face)
Clan/Organization: Uzumaki Clan- the clan whose motto is 1 is the loneliest number.
Partner/s: His endless supply of sports memorabilia
Character Appearance
Eyes: Black
Hair: Blonde
Attire: Ijoufu is always seen wearing at least 1 piece of sports equipment or a jersey. Also he always carries his “equipment bag” and his “playbook” (Explained Later)
Height: 5’7”
Weight: 164
Bloodtype: O+
Family and History
Family: This is under speculation of every fan of the Naruto series therefore I won’t spoil it (As if I knew the answer...)
Family History: I am strictly forbidden under the penalty of perjury and therefore I will plead the 5th for this.
Character History:
Welcome to the life and times of Uzumaki Ijoufu. Like all great minds, athletes, or people, Ijoufu was faced with a life changing hardship early in his childhood, at birth infact. On the day the ancient beast of legend, the Kyuubi, or Nine-Tailed Demon Fox was sealed by the heroic actions of Yondaime Hokage. The honor granted by this “blessing” was unfortunately lost upon the people of Konoha however, They mistook the “blessing” and understood it as a “curse,” It is a shame that such a great man would be so tormented by the misunderstandings of the common people. If only the Yondaime Hokage had not needed to sacrifice his own body to contain the demon the message would not have been falsely interpreted.
Alas, due to the misconception from his birth to age 3 he was excruciatingly malnourished by his foster family. During a visit Sandaime Hokage discovered the boy’s incredibly emaciated state. As a favor to the boy and to his successor, Sandaime sent the boy away to a normal village to live free of the ninja life until he was more prepared. The village was not very far from Konoha but due to the danger of Kyuubi being present several undercover ANBU were always on watch.
At age 3 he became aware enough of his surroundings to start making friends. He was quite popular, though at age 3 this is not very difficult. Over the next 3 years his popularity continued. He was an athlete and great athletes with great personalities are always popular.
From the moment he learned of their existence Ijoufu was in love with sports, sports strategy, sports facts, everything sports related. Whatever method he could use he would enjoy every sport he could find. He would scour libraries of film and libraries of books just so he could learn more. He knew everything that could be known.
By the age of 7 Ijoufu was the most popular lonely child ever. Even though he had many friends they had many problems playing with him. He was not only knowledgeable in sports but skilled in them too. His friends just couldn’t keep up at all. He would always end up being the best referee known to man.
A few months after Ijoufu’s 7th birthday he was blessed with a more than special guest, The legendary 3rd Hokage had graced the village with his presence. Everyone was excited unaware to the reason. When he requested to see Ijoufu it was a shock to some. Was Konoha going to start an inter-country sports league? Nearly everyone was caught off guard when Ijoufu was summoned to return to his home in Konoha to reclaim his place training as a ninja. People were more shocked when Ijoufu immediately responded with a blatant, “NO!”
The Hokage took Ijoufu aside. ”Ijoufu, you must understand your place is with Konoha. You must have noticed the apparent physical differences. You are a ninja and always will be.”
Ijoufu shook his head in obvious agreement, “I knew I was a ninja, but Ninja are not humans. Humans care, they feel. Hokage-sama, have you ever eaten wood splinters because nothing else was available? Have you ever been forced to deal the grains of the wood destroy your throat?!”
The Hokage was astonished, “So you seem to remember. This does make things more difficult. The most I can guarantee is you will not have to rely on others. The people of Konoha will supply you with housing and food bills. I will do what I can to ensure you will not ever have to face that again.”
Ijoufu sat silent for several minutes just staring at the most powerful man in the country. He was using everything he had learned about finding clues by looking at facial expressions and features. He could find no trace of deception. Hesitantly he agreed. He knew no athlete could succeed and become a better one without rising to the competition. The competition was certainly too low here.
Ijoufu was settled into his apartment in Konoha within the week. It was painful leaving his friends but he simply explained it as being called up to the big leagues. Ijoufu was truly a loner in Konoha. He noticed everyone wanted to play Ninja, never baseball or any other sport. If he was allowed to play he didn’t understand the rules (nor did he want to) nearly well enough to play effectively. He was lonely for most of his 7th year of life.
When he was 8 Ijoufu was allowed to enter the academy. He trained with all his might and even found himself to be considered skilled in comparison to some of the others. The one downfall was his social skills. Everyone he was with knew nothing of how to throw a proper curveball or to perfect a spiral on a football, they were more concerned how to mold chakra or how their dad’s stuck to the walls with just their feet. They just wanted bigger signing bonuses.
Ijoufu was called by his teachers, Coach, originally because of his sports knowledge but after a while because they knew Coaches to be a different breed of person. Ijoufu would only seem content when he could help someone else. His skills always seemed to be just enough to be not noticed except when he was helping someone else. His sensei always noticed his forms and skills never seem truly polished until someone needed an example for help. He really relished any opportunity to help.
Ijoufu went through school for 3 years quite unfulfilled. He was known as the kid who could help you if you needed anything, but you shouldn’t hang out with him. Apparently despite his leaving, the parents never forgot his existence…..why? Why was he so hated that one family would starve him and all others would ostracize him?
When a coach is put up against the odds there is 1 thing to do... Watch film. In this case film was forfeit to the library record books. He checked over everything he could. Mainly he checked in pertaining to his birth year. One fact remained outstanding, the disappearance of the beast that killed so many. All that is mentioned was the 4th agve his life to seal the beast…… WHERE? HOW? This had something to do with him.
A few weeks went by in class; the normal spark that fueled Ijoufu had disappeared. His lackluster performance continued straight into the exam week and he was summarily failed, despite all his previous perfection.
The moment the academy tests were given out Ijoufu immediately ran to his new hangout, the library. He continued scanning every bit of Konoha History for a way to find out the slightest clue as to his existence. Soon after the unthinkable happened, someone had answers.
Exactly 1 week after graduation Ijoufu checked one of the newer books about Konoha History, inside it was a note addressed to him.
Dear Ijoufu,
I know what you have been searching for. I know your past, I know your future. I know why you were starved and why you are hated. I know why you come here everyday looking for a new clue. I can help, but I’d need your help too. If you are interested meet me in section Z-25, I will contact you there.
Signed,
The Key to Your Past
Ijoufu’s curiosity could not be contained. He had to find out what this was about. His past, his existence... the questions he so desired could finally be answered. He slowly moved to the section trying to say as inconspicuous as possible.
He arrived in section Z-25 only to find a large scroll left leaning on a bookcase. Ijoufu could feel it in his bones that in that scroll were answers in some way or another. He took the scroll and make haste out of the village
There he was sitting in the forest sprawled out trying to figure out everything in the scroll. Everything was in order he had to start from the basics, that was how sports training worked, with the fundamentals.
He worked and worked, the jutsu was something very complex. He was exhausting his chakra abilities just trying to learn it. When he first succeeded on the jutsu it had to have been more than 12 hours. Light had already left and returned. The jutsu was perfect for Ijoufu though. If anything he had a real team now. The jutsu, Kage Bunshin was perfect for the type of person he wanted to be, the perfect athlete.
The scroll must have been filled with other great things. The moment he began to move to the second page he felt eyes watching him. Someone was near. Out of the shadows came the librarian...wait what? Yes it was the only person who knew what books Ijoufu was looking at. He brought out a sword, the calm and educated humanity that dictated his life was overshadowed by his intense bloodlust. He was here to kill Ijoufu!
He went to pounce Ijoufu, “DIE FOX!”
It hit him harder than the librarian ever could. He was NOT THE FOX! The fox didn’t like sports the fox didn’t have friends who he was forced to leave! Ijoufu, barely escaped a fatal wound when he brought his hand up to deflect the attack. If any time was proper now was the best one to use his new technique.
Long story short Team Ijoufu beat the Librarian worse than the 49ers beat the Broncos in Superbowl XXIV. Good thing he liked books, he would have several months to kill in the hospital after Ijoufu did the Superbowl Shuffle on his face.
When the other ninja arrived they found Ijoufu stomping on his unconscious assailant. He was shouting the same thing over and over again, “I AM MYSELF!” When he was brought out before the Sandaime Hokage it was discovered the Hokage had witnessed most of the incident. In respect for Ijoufu’s previous grades and obvious understanding of Ninja techniques he was graduated to Genin.
Combat Info
Weapons:(note these are the pieces of equipment Ijoufu has,he does not keep them with him at all times.)
5x Kunai
5x Shuriken
“Baseball Bombs” (Baseballs with Exploding tags on them)
“Big Boom Football” (a football with exploding tags. More area more tags.)
Football pads and helmet
Baseball Bat
“Puck You’s” (Hockey Puck with flash tags on them.)
Hockey Stick
Virtually every piece of sports equipment though these are the most notable.
Jutsu:
Name: Bunshin no Jutsu - Clone Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: The user creates ethereal copies of themselves from chakra that are unable to speak or make contact with an object. They disappear after a single hit.
Rank: E
Cost: 1
Name: Henge – Transform
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: A basic jutsu where the user alters their appearance. Those with a doujutsu (i.e. Sharingan and Byakugan) can see through it very easily.
Rank: E
Cost: 1
Name: Kawarimi - Body Substitution Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: A very basic escape jutsu where the user switches places with a nearby object.
Rank: E
Cost: 1
Name: Kage Bunshin no Jutsu – Shadow Replication Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: As Bunshin no Jutsu but the clones are corporeal until they are dealt critical damage.
Rank: A
Cost: ?
Name: Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu – Mass Shadow Replication Skill
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: As Kage Bunshin no Jutsu but with far greater numbers.
Rank: S
Cost: ?
Special: Ijoufu is the container for the mythical 9-tailed beast Kyuubi. This grants special powers to Ijoufu during times of great emotional rage (though he doesn’t know this yet.)
**Other: